What are boundaries? 

Boundaries are rules that you decide on to create a smoother more comfortable life. 

They range from big things like how you allow people to treat you, to little things like when you are happy to answer work calls, everyone has boundaries but not everyone respects them. 

My business boundaries with my children. 

 When I first started my beauty business,  I worked for a salon, but also for myself at home. At the time I was a single mum with a 2 bed flat, and my girls were 6 and 9, there were times when they were a handful!

Before I started working from home I sat them down and we had a family meeting, something we often did as a 3. I told them my plan and why I wanted to do it and I asked if they were with me.

I would need them to stay in their room while I had clients and it was important I didn't see or hear them.

I set boundaries.

It takes confidence to set boundaries,  whether it be with family members,  your children or clients.

There can be feelings of guilt, feelings of who am I to be in charge, feelings that you don't deserve what you're asking for, or even past wounds of unfair rules from your childhood stopping you from wanting to inflict any kind of restriction onto your loved ones.

The trouble is it hurts people more when you don't set boundaries,  and it's confusing for them. They may feel like they don't know where they stand and it can either mean people walk all over you, or you push them away as they feel uncomfortable.

Boundaries give certainty and everyone appreciates and respects knowing where they stand.

Back to my girls and my business. They were angels. Often my clients would assume they were out as they were so quiet. Occasionally if a client was in deep relaxation on my couch in the living room I might hear giggles coming from their room next door, but it made me smile.

To know they were happy, I was providing for them and my client was getting the love and care she needed too.

Don't get me wrong there were times in the beginning when they would play up. Come out of their room and run down the hallway or be too noisy, and I would have to tell them to be quiet.

But I did it consistently and in a short time they learnt that they would NEVER be allowed in the living room while I had clients, and they would NEVER not be pulled up for running up and down the hall while I was working so they gave up trying.

They had the whole rest of the flat, but quietly.

If you set clear boundaries, explain why you're setting them and most importantly stick to what you say (that's so important) then those boundaries will stay in place and everyone is happier. If I had let my children in occasionally to see the clients that liked them I would have been sending mixed messages and that is not fair on them.

It would not have been their fault for trying to come in any time they liked, because I was not clear or consistent.

The same goes for your children. How often do they interrupt you when you are working?

Or your mum calling to chat or your friend phoning in her lunch break for a natter.

Are you getting done what you need to for a successful business?

Set your boundaries and stick to them and you will see so much more productive in your day, you will feel more accomplished and everyone around you will be happier as they will know where they stand.

Join Confidence in Business to hear 5 ways to build the confidence to set boundaries and learn how to stop being a people pleaser for good.